Stuck writing your first blog post? Better give up now!
So you just registered this blog, thought of a cute name, picked a pretty theme, tweaked some styles here and there, and all of a sudden you find yourself staring at this blank page that is supposed to become your first post, aka your grand appearance on the world stage. So, basically no pressure at all!
And boom (!) here's that voice in your head again. The eternal critic, who has seen you fail countless times before. It's now urging you to look at something else for distraction, some quick happy moment away from that blank page, away from this toxic cloud of self-doubt.
You have to admit, it's very tempting, but it's actually just a clever scheme, a protection mechanism of your fragile ego. If you don't start, you can't really fail. It keeps the illusion alive that greatness could still hide somewhere inside you, if you would just give it ONE serious attempt.
But how to start? Where to even begin?
Since this is your first public post (ever!) you have to give it your best shot. There is no second chance to make a good first impression.
If you fail now, you might as well quit before this gets too embarrassing. Who knows how many people might be watching? Plus, the internet doesn't forget. Never in a thousand years!
Worst-case scenario: your post may actually end up as a meme on social media, your profile pic a laughing stock to the masses. Your former work colleagues will pretend they don't know you, but on second thought, they probably assume you always seemed a bit strange. So you better have a backup plan ready, in case you need to skip town on short notice.
But here's the thing. No one's watching, no one's judging. Actually, no one gives a shit - at all. Everyone is too busy with their own lives, their own little projects, their own pile of broken dreams and unfulfilled desires. Whatever the case, surely no one was waiting for glorious "you" to pop up out of nowhere and write the perfect first post on a new blog nobody has ever heard about. You might as well get in line behind the other thirty trillion blogs no one has ever heard about or ever will.
Sure, this all sounds reasonable, but you still want to write something good, even if it's only read by one single person, even if that person is actually just you. You simply want to feel good about something you created yourself. Damn it, is that too much to ask?
No, not at all! You have every right to ask for this, but this desire to write something good on your first attempt, might secretly sabotage your actual mission - finally start sharing your own thoughts with the world. Not just once, but perhaps on a regular basis, or whenever you feel like it. Develop a real habit, become part of a community of like-minded spirits, share something actually meaningful. Who knows, someone might actually benefit from what you have to say.
However, all of this is only possible if you are brave enough to be horrendously bad at something new. You have to start at the bottom and learn this honourable craft the only way possible, through repeated stupid, dumb, and dumber mistakes.
Honestly, it's the ONLY way, unless of course, you don't mind selling your soul to some AI. But the truth is, nobody wants to read that AI shit. Personally, I would rather read a high school poem written by my mother-in-law than a clever reinterpretation of Shakespeare generated by a soulless machine. And let me remind you, that's coming from a guy whose own blog is called "computerlove".
So forget about these shortcuts, and get ready to finally make your first meaningful mistakes. Keep in mind, there is no such thing as perfect writing, ever(!). Many people believe perfect writing is based on gradual improvement of already good writing. Let me assure you, it is not. All great writing is based upon a pile of poo, a deliberate pile of stinking ugly-ass poo to be precise.
You gotta let go and give yourself permission to write utter rubbish. Quite literally, allow yourself to vomit sheer stupidity right onto the page, and do it proudly, because you are now on your way to find your own true voice. And this, believe it or not, is the secret to great writing.
Now repeat this step a couple of times in the coming days or weeks and who knows what will happen, you may become unstoppable.
Now, don't make that face again. Seriously, stop doubting yourself! Just let all that shit go and throw your worst insides on that empty page. Then tomorrow, or next week, you do it again. Trust me, I know you will succeed.
In case you were wondering, yes, I was actually talking to myself here. So, thank you for sharing this special moment with me. I'm happy you were part of my first post, and if it's not too much to ask, I'd be delighted to see you around for the next one.
So long my anonymous friend - take care!